Sometimes you need to remind yourself who you are when you are not “mom”.
First off, don’t get it twisted. I retain my identity as “mommy” 24/7. But when you are a stay-at-mom-home, or a working mom, you need a break now and then.
As a stay-at-home mom, I will admit I take these “breaks” in many forms.
- Monthly mani-pedis
- Solo trips to the store
- Extra minutes in the restroom (even if I’m not really going #2)
I even have the girls go to daycare once a week so I have a day completely to myself. These days are meant to be my study days, but in reality, I give them to myself so I can essentially do whatever I want.
And because I am a stay-at-home mom, my contact with other adults other than my husband is very limited. While my husband and I go on as many date nights as possible, something else I have started prioritizing are mommy-dates with fellow-mommy BFFs. In the last year I have seen an article or two about the importance of “momcations” so in the spirit of momcations, my mommy-besties and I have made an effort to have mommy dates until the day comes when we can finally take our momcation.
I’ll admit the first time I went on a mommy date, I did carry a sense of guilt with me as I stepped on to the ferry boat that would take me away from my family for the afternoon. It was not more-so that I was worried that my kids would miss me or that I would miss them, but that I was stepping away from my “full-time job”. But once I was there, with my girlfriends, chatting it up about our lives and kids, I realized that everyone takes a break from their full-time job so why should it be any different for me? And just like that, my sense of guilt disappeared.
I finally started to remember who I am other than mommy.
I am a partner, a friend, a listener, a story-teller, an advocate of kindness, a lover of positivity, a human being.
To be the best mom possible for my girls, I know I need stay true to who I am, even if it means stepping away from them for a few hours.
Recently a fellow-mommy bestie (who also happens to be my BFF of 25+ years), invited me to attend a food event in SF that only comes around once a year. I felt completely honored that I was her first choice date after her own husband. To be honest, my husband was pretty upset because he has been wanting to attend this event for years, but luckily, he was completely understanding to my need to spend time with my friend.
This was the first time in years that we had an afternoon together. And for the first time in forever, I only had to think about myself for a few hours. It was glorious.
Here are a few of my favorite photos from my latest mommy-date adventure 🙂
Fellow mommies, if you are needing that mommy-day-away. Just do it. Your kids will thank you for it later.
And be sure to catch my complete experience with my BFF during our day out with our latest vlog at LivNGwiththeNGs 🙂