You Are Stronger Than You Realize

I saw a quote today that really stuck with me:

“This is tough, but I am tougher.”

During this chaotic time in our lives, I really want to focus on what I do have. And to remind myself that being “stuck” at home is tough, but I am tougher.

This week marks week 3 of our shelter-in-place. In the beginning of all of this, I wasn’t too phased by having to stay indoors and keep my kids at home with me because it’s basically my every day life as a stay-at-home-mom. But as the weeks move on and the shelter-in-place has been extended, I am starting to feel my anxiety creep up on me a little more. And the reality of the situation is starting to put a toll on my mental health.

• I am sad I cannot see my family and friends.
• I am scared to go outside.
• I am scared that my husband, who’s job has now been deemed essential, can get sick or bring the virus home.
• I am sad my kids aren’t able to go to their happy places – the playground, school, their grandparents’ houses, etc.
• I am disappointed we had to postpone our Spring Break trip that I’ve been planning since last October.
• And I am worried about giving birth without my husband by my side.

But at the same time, I am so grateful and feeling so blessed for what we do have.

• I am grateful for the technology of FaceTime and Zoom calls to connect with my loved ones and for the girls to connect with their teachers and classmates. I feel like with all the free time we have, I’m actually talking to my loved ones more than before. While no hugs are involved, just having conversations with them fills my heart.
• I am grateful we live in a place where it’s not too cold and not too hot. We live in a part of California where the Spring time means you’re just going outside in a light sweater and leggings. This has made going outside for walks and bike rides part of our daily routine, and the girls just love it.

• While I am worried for my husband’s health, I am grateful he still has work to keep him busy during this time and that we still have income coming in. To be honest, I think quarantine would be much harder on me mentally if I had to listen to my husband complain how bored he is everyday.
• I am grateful for Amazon, online grocery services, and really all technology that makes sheltering easier. In anticipation of the quarantine lasting longer, we went ahead and ordered an at-home jumpy house for the girls. The joy it gives them just lights up my heart each time they wait for it to blow-up. They also don’t seem to notice much has “changed” in our lives which really puts into perspective how adults are looking at this entire situation. I wish we can all live as resiliently as children.

• I am grateful that we’ll be going on our trip during my birthday like originally planned. Before I found out I was pregnant, I had requested that my big 3-0 be spent on a family trip, and when I found out I was pregnant we decided to move it up before the baby’s arrival. Guess it was always in our cards to have this trip for my birthday after-all 🙂
• I am grateful there’s still 4 months until baby boy is here. No one knows when this chaos will “mellow out”, but I am being hopeful that it will by the time the baby is due. And if it doesn’t, I have to remind myself that “this is tough, but I am tougher”.

There’s a lot of fear in the world right now, but instead of living in fear, I am doing my best to live in love and gratitude. And I hope you all are too. Just remember, you are stronger than you realize!

Stay safe and healthy, friends!

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